Tag Archives: Sexuality

on Emotions.

Love

I feel like people are very emotionally repressed these days.  We’re regularly encouraged – mostly by big media outlets like TV, film, and radio – to hide our emotions, bury them, deny them, and express them in unhealthy ways.  I want to shine a light on what some of those ways are – as they aren’t always easy to spot if you’re not looking for them – as well as discuss some healthy alternatives to the examples we so often are presented with.  (:

One of the most obvious examples is anger.  Reality TV teaches people to be catty, aggressive, and even violent, and most other media outlets seem to promote violence as an appropriate reaction to anger as well.  You won’t find many examples of people just talking out their problems like the grown adults that they should be, because apparently it doesn’t make for “good TV”, but I have learned from experience that most disagreements are a result of some kind of miscommunication and can be solved with calm, well thought-out, proper communication.

Sadness is often portrayed as something for the “weak,” especially if you’re male, but also if you’re female – there was a song that came out just a few years ago by Fergie entitled “Big Girls Don’t Cry.”  If sadness is being portrayed as an okay emotion to feel, it is often done so in this whiney, poor-me, the-world-is-ending, I’m-so-depressed kind of way.  I think sadness is one of those emotions that you should definitely feel to the fullest without trying to repress it, but then after feeling it fully you’ve got to move through it and past it – it shouldn’t be something that consumes you.

Jealousy is a really scary one, as it is often accepted as warranting controlling and even abusive behavior (so many mega-hit pop songs today are about basically abusive relationships – Maroon 5’s One More Night has 200 million views on Youtube, Lady Gaga’s Bad Romance has 525 million, and Eminem and Rihanna’s Love the Way You Lie? 581 million.)  In my opinion, we are far too accepting of jealousy – and as a result, controlling behaviors like screening texts – especially in romantic, but honestly all relationships today.  But that’s because that’s all the media ever lets us see.  Jealousy actually represents insecurities, and the healthy way to deal with it is to identify said insecurities and work through them – not use it as an excuse to dictate somebody else’s behavior.

When it comes to what we think of as some of the “better” emotions – feeling love, as one example – we’re often taught not to “let it show” and even just avoid love altogether because it can be “risky.”  While I do agree that anytime you choose to trust someone you are taking an emotional risk, the biggest risks are usually attached to the greatest rewards, and the only way to have truly fulfilling relationships is to put yourself out there knowing full well that you could be rejected.  As for something like happiness – especially if it is resulting from any accomplishments – you’ll usually see it as something to rub in people’s faces while “fxcking the haterz,” but I wholeheartedly believe that joy is something that we should be sharing and not keeping to ourselves.

Last, but not least – and this really shouldn’t take much explaining: our naturally sexual nature has been twisted and made into something dirty and shameful when it is actually beautiful and (in my opinion) sacred.  I don’t have the typical conservative view that sexuality should be kept behind closed doors and nudity should only be acceptable between two people in a relationship together, but I do think that we should view the human body, as well as sex, in a respectful way and not in the hyper-sexual, shallow way it is often presented in.

So that’s my opinion on many common emotions and feelings and how they’re often misrepresented.  It’s a proven fact that emotional repression, as well as any unhealthy expressing of emotion, only leads to further unhealthiness and unhappiness.  We do all know how bad mental stress and anxiety is for your body, right?  Good. (: If not, go look it up!  Anyway, I think we need to learn how to deal with intense emotions in much more healthy and appropriate ways.  I hope I was able to give you an idea of what that looks like with this post.

As always – much love to you all,

Moar Nudity.

This topic really gets me riled up for some reason.  I think it’s because from growing up, I personally know the general “conservative” stance on the subject and I know how much energy they give to it and how they look at it.  Nowadays, I’ll see people freaking out about nudity and pornography like “HOLY mother of Jesusssss! Naked bodies and reproducing: that’s the most sinful, immoral, shameful, disgusting thing our kids could ever SEEEEEE! This is why the world is going down the drainnnnn!”

And I’m just like… It is.  A body.  A. BODY.  Teach your kids what they look like from a young age and it will be no surprise to them to see them (research confirms this).  Teach your kids respect for other people and you don’t have to worry about them looking at people in dirty or perverted ways.  Teach your kids why sex is for adults and what it involves and its consequences, etcetera, etcetera, and maybe, just maybe, they’ll make the right choices. If not, guess what?  They’ll learn their lesson!  It’s not your job to literally keep them from making any and all bad choices they might make in life.  It’s your job to inform them and be there for them, guiding them the entire way.

I know – again, personally – from having parents who didn’t really talk to me about sexuality and the like, that if they had encouraged me to just be open with them, instead of making the topic of sex more or less taboo in our household, I probably wouldn’t have gone behind their backs when it came to stuff like that.  I would have just told them up front, or at least would have told them when they asked (if it were done so lovingly, and not accusingly).  But, of course, that’s not what happened.  So instead, I hid it.  So that I wouldn’t get in trouble.  I was more worried about getting in trouble than I was concerned about being honest with my parents.

If that sounds like a recipe for disaster, it’s because it is.  Being able to trust your parents is an important thing.  There has to be a better method of disciplining.

But more on topic.. why sexuality?  Why is it that out of the nearly infinite number of things you could choose to represent immorality, you choose sex?  Something completely natural.  What is it that’s just so disgustingly immoral about it?  Please tell me. 

People are murdered cold-blood every day.  Why don’t you feel so strongly about that?  Most people won’t think twice about letting their kids watch a movie whose entire plot revolves around two people trying to kill each other, or play a game with the same goal — killing.  “Have at it!  The bloodier the better!” they’ll say.  Now take a movie and make it revolve around two people falling in love, then put a sex scene in it.  Oh, now you want to freak out.  Now you want to moan and groan about how immoral our society is becoming.  You people make me sick sometimes.

Teach your kids LOVE.  Teach them peace, and patience.  Teach critical thinking and COMPASSION.  Honesty.  Sharing.  Respect.  And being Real.  Stop worrying so much about if they might accidentally see a breast somewhere, or – God forbid – people procreating. 

People seriously believe that that is what is corrupting the youth of today.  And that’s what the hell is wrong with this world.

Still love you guys though,

Related Posts: Nudity and the Female Form., Nature is Calling., Oh, it Affects You..